My work explores the impact of loss on an individual’s perspective of the world around them. The grieving process is something that everyone must experience at some point or another in his or her life. However, this universal experience is highly personal to me.
This collection of imagery is about my own experience.
On September 2, 2012 my brother Danny took his own life at the age of 25.
Since then, I have not been able to differentiate what is up and what is down. The feelings of loss and emptiness, as well as confusion and disassociation cloud my mind and present themselves through the imagery that I’ve created.
At this point in time, I knowingly accept that the void I feel inside, right below the center of my ribcage, cannot and will never be filled. In fact, it would be wrong to deny the scar of the absence that my brother has left me with.
Through this series, I work to document my personal perspective of this loss. The lingering emptiness is present in everything that consumes my mind. All I’m left with are memories of my life with my brother, these memories from childhood that are blurry and scrambled and tossed around in my head. These memories are scattered and unclear to me, but I hold them dearly to my heart.
A sibling relationship is supposed to be the longest human relationship that you will keep in your life- siblings dramatically shape the person that you ultimately become. Siblings are always a very present part of one another.
What happens to someone when that other half of them is torn away and dissipated into ashes? The “living half” may fall to pieces as well.
These photographs represent my effort to collect the fallen pieces of myself.